Leading Well Starts With Being Well

Picture the leader who shows up before sunrise and is the last to leave long after the parking lot is empty. Their inbox is never at zero, their calendar is double-booked, and their coffee mug rarely leaves their hand. Colleagues admire their “dedication.” What they don’t see is the cost: skipped meals, restless nights, frayed patience, and a creeping sense of burnout that erodes judgment and compassion.

Too often, this story is worn like a badge of honor. In reality, it’s a warning sign.

The False Narrative of Sacrifice

In leadership, self-neglect often gets disguised as commitment. We glorify the leader who “pushes through” exhaustion, who never takes a day off, who always puts others first. This mindset fuels a dangerous myth: self-care is an indulgence, something leaders squeeze in only if they happen to find time.

But there is never extra time. Waiting for the perfect moment to rest, recharge, or reset guarantees that moment never arrives. Leaders who cling to this myth slowly drain themselves until they can no longer serve the very people who rely on them.

Care as a Core of Sustainable Leadership

Within the Sustainable Leadership model, Care is one of the three non-negotiable pillars, alongside Clarity and Capacity. Care is not about occasional wellness activities or token gestures. It is a mindset that places well-being at the center of leadership.

When leaders take care of themselves, they:

• Model sustainability for their teams, showing that important work can be done without self-destruction.

• Create permission for others to prioritize their own health, reducing burnout across the organization.

• Sharpen performance, because rested, focused leaders make better decisions and manage conflict more effectively.

Neglecting care has consequences that extend beyond the individual. Teams reflect the energy of their leaders. A depleted leader cultivates a depleted culture.

Self-Care as Responsibility, Not Reward

Self-care should never be treated like dessert after a long meal. It isn’t something earned only after grinding yourself down. Think of it as maintenance akin to the oil change for the engine or the sharpening of the saw. Leaders who ignore maintenance eventually break down, and the ripple effect can be costly.

Reframing self-care as a responsibility means shifting from “I don’t have time for this” to “I cannot afford to ignore this.” The first mindset delays action indefinitely. The second acknowledges that neglect has consequences too serious to overlook.

Practical Strategies for Leading with Care

Here are four actionable ways to integrate care into leadership practice:

Redefine Boundaries

Block non-negotiable time for meals, exercise, family, or reflection just as you would for a board meeting. Protect it without apology. Leaders who fail to guard their time rarely protect their team’s time either.

Normalize Rest

Publicly acknowledge when you’re taking a day off, leaving early, or shutting down email after a certain hour. By modeling boundaries, you create psychological safety for your team to do the same.

Build Micro-Practices

Care doesn’t always require a day at the spa. It could be square breathing between meetings, a 10-minute walk, journaling before bed, or turning the commute into a decompression ritual. Small practices, when done consistently, become powerful protection against stress.

Listen to Your Dashboard

Just as cars flash warning lights, our bodies and minds signal distress signals such as fatigue, irritability, forgetfulness. Ignoring those signs is like driving with the check engine light on. Pay attention early before small issues become crises.

Lead by Caring First

Leadership is not about being invincible. It is about being responsible enough to sustain yourself so you can sustain others.

Here’s the challenge: This week, pick one concrete action that puts your well-being at the center of your leadership. Block time. Say no to an unnecessary meeting. End your workday when it should end.

When you care for yourself, you are not stepping away from leadership. You are stepping into it more fully.

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If this article resonated, you’ll find more strategies and tools in my book, Sustainable Leadership: Leading with Clarity, Capacity, and Care. It’s designed to help leaders put these ideas into practice in sustainable ways.